Picky Eaters

So everyone talks about their toddlers and preschoolers with these fabulous appetities. Not me. Two kids, two terrible eaters. With our oldest, we went to every feeding program out there on the east coast (or so it seemed). She was just so skinny and fragile (she still is super thin). We thought that something was wrong with her. After seeing a million doctors, she's fine - just not as hungry as her peers. Now our son is eating about as much as our daughter, essentially milk and nothing else. Luckily, he is still gaining weight but it's slow and honestly, we don't know how. Maybe it's all the chocolate milk and chocolate chips and animal crackers and other small cookies that we give to him out of desperation.

What is a parent supposed to do to get their child to eat. We all know the rules - don't be confrontational, give them lots of nutritious options, don't let them have more than 16 - 24 ounces of milk a day etc. How do you avoid showing your child frustration if day in and day out they eat like a bird? I really thought our son would be a eater. One child at least! Now our daughter is 24 lbs at three and a half and our son is about 21.5 at 16 months. At least he's on the growth chart and I guess that should make us happy. I wish that there was some magic out there though.